Quotes from the “Glee” season 2 episode 7, “Substitute”:

Will: “I thought we were friends?”
Sue Sylvester: “That got boring.”

Teri: “You have to admit no matter how toxic our marriage was I was really good at taking care of you when you were sick.”
Will: “That’s because you like me best when I’m weak.”

“Lindsay Lohan is totally crazy, isn’t she?” — Holly Holiday in spanish

“You smell homeless, Brett. Homeless.” — Kurt

Santana: “What would you know about Cee-Lo because you’re like … 40.”
Holly: “Top 40, sweet cheeks.”

“Humiliation: bested by the Beiste! Reality is I’m a champion and once I get power I do not let it go.” — Sue

“They look like deep fried deer poop.” — Britanny on tater tots

“Jackée, I’m like my idol Richard Millhouse Nixon regarding his time was petty, corrupt and penile he always had the best intentions of his people in mind.” — Sue Sylvester

“Rachel – you suck! You’re like a total drag! Has anyone ever told you that?” — Holly

Holly: “Rachel, I used to be just like you trying to get everything so right, hanging on so tight.”
Rachel: “What happened?”
Holly: “I got punched in the face.”

“If marriage is so sacred they should outlaw divorce.” — Blaine

“Oh my God, I opened up my mouth and a little purse fell out!” — Kurt in Mercedes’ fantasy

“Her name was Cameo. She was like an attractive Biggie Smalls.” — Holly

“Mr. Schuester taught me the second half of the alphabet. I stopped after M and N. I felt they were too similar and got frustrated.” — Brittany

“I suggest selling yourself on Craigslist under the heading of men seeking men with butt chins.” — Sue Sylvester to Will

Will: “When I’m sick there’s only one thing that makes me feel good.”
Artie: “Gin and juice …”

Holly: “My name is Holly Holiday.”
Teri: “Are you a porn star or a drag queen?”

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